No Tears in Heaven

"It’s from that comfortable perch where you’ll set your glass down and reach for his Nikon. You’ll snap another photo for this year’s album before adorning your german heritage enriched matriarchal tone and warn him,  “You’ll cut that up into steaks, not fillets. I like the Kings as steaks better than fillets.” From behind his mustache a subtle smile will crack open and you’ll see it more in his eyes than from his lips. He’ll heave the mammoth fish onto the table of the cleaning station and carry out your instructions to task. It’s late June and the sun will be up all night. You’ll have to keep an eye on the clock when you return home to the cabin, or he’ll be out far too late tending to his yard and garden. Though, it will be nice to have the latter part of the afternoon to yourself, so that you can cook in the kitchen without disruption. You’ll package the salmon steaks into freezer bags and process them in the vacuum sealer. Then you’ll start a spaghetti sauce and saute some clams for dinner. As their shells begin to open, you’ll discard the ones that refuse to surrender. About that time, you’ll call him in to wash up and set the table. He’ll set out the simple but aesthetically pleasing white and green porcelain plates featuring silhouettes of bull moose. Then he’ll retrieve two Nachmann crystal glasses from the neoclassical vitrine stationed near the south window of the dining room; where the sun can most effectively showcase the beauty of the multi-colored array of imported diningware you’ve collected. He’ll set aside his caveman-like modus for an hour, so that the two of you can drink a bottle of aged Silver Oak from hand crafted Bavarian crystal, and engage in a deep conversation about anything and everything… or nothing. He’d do that for you. He’ll always do that for you."

Home in the Real

"Between my homes in the natural world, an intermediary exists.  A purgatory for which I routinely pass through by unnatural means, surrounded by unnatural creatures, in an unnatural environment. I navigate through the crowd of aimless bipedal animals as their eyes remain fixed on the fluorescent glow in their palms, and they bounce off each other, moving with only a semblance of intention.  I join them as we stack upon one another in a metal container and it burns the hydrocarbons left behind by ancient life, which serve to thrust the vessel into the atmosphere."

Just Keep Grinding

"It happens in those moments, deep in the jungle, secluded from all things you know of modernity and, in sync with the wilderness you were created to hold dominion over. That is the powerful realization that comes of experiencing Eden. That is the life changing perspective that falls upon the exclusive few who will enter this venue with an intrepid spirit to pursue these carnivorous, river dwelling dreadnoughts of the ancient world. A connection to the deep jungle not only instills a warm memory in sport, but also, it cultivates an acute awareness of the long arduous process of which our ancestors climbed from a middle position in the food chain prior to building the modernity that surrounds us all in our typical daily lives. Eden is not a vacation destination, it is in itself a journey to a moment of authentic and unbridled actualization. It's a venue to feel real in a world so unfamiliar with reality."

The Flood

"That is the horror of the advocacy of “fairness.” It’s a drive deriving from the fanatical prospect of equal outcome and, only a specific perspective of the human experience facilitates it. I will explain more about that in a moment but, the reality is; there is no fairness. It doesn’t exist in the natural order and actually, that’s perfectly fair. "

Trout Spey/Swing – Wyoming

"That being said, much like all the other branches of this sport, Spey has its own specialness to it and, as you familiarize yourself with it, it tends to instill a confidence in an angler as an amiable benefit of it featuring long and satisfyingly smooth casts across large bodies of water. In alignment with that, the power of the type of fish who will eat a seductively swung fly is something notable and, you just can’t truly appreciate it until you feel them try to strip the rod from your hands."

Suffering

"Happiness is at the end of a long road or atop a tall mountain. It’s in the silence that resonates after a hard fight. Happiness is earned. It lies, covered in a thin layer of dust, just beyond what we believe our reach to be. We aren’t born knowing what it feels like. It’s foreign to us until we push ourselves harder and stretch ourselvs further than we've ever done so before. We only feel that happiness once we've exhausted ourselves to clench it."

Anytime, pal.

"Usually, when I pull down the drive on my way home, I can see Roger and his does digging through the snow to feed on the meadow grass below. They lift their heads and watch me as I carry my tired body towards the porch. Consequently, Roger always walks out to the path to meet me. He watches me as I walk by, surveying my behavior. In my mind, he's just another head-of-household, keeping situationally aware and looking out for his tribe."

Christmas 2025

"The Big Dog provides, (in an almost poetic sense), such largesse. Christmas isn’t about the gifts we give each other, it’s about the gifts he has given us. It’s about establishing and indulging in an emulation of his everlasting serenity, here on Earth, for a narrow window of time." 

Russian Fall

"I bet the wait staff and neighboring table of patrons would be as charismatic and conversational as always and, when the elation washes over our waiter at the sight of the unconventionally large tip I left him in the spirit of our tradition, I bet he'll express his gratitude by using a portion of it to bring us a couple of cold glasses from the freezer and a complimentary pitcher of Raspberry Wheat." 

The Lamb

"In doing so, I’ve come to understand the critically imperative philosophical roots of some of the most common western sociological convictions, and how they prosper in certain environments or head-spaces. Consequently, I’ve come to see there are two paths before every man who comes up in an affluent society and in an ironic condition of unfortunate intrinsicality and serendipity, there is little anyone can do to prevent the inevitable end in which each path eventuates. One path defines the people who are holding candlelight vigils and peacefully mourning today. The other leads to those who are dancing in the streets, enunciating “we got Charlie in the neck!” through manic cackles and demonic celebrations." 

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